HAVE A PROPER BLOODY MARY WITHOUT LEAVING YOUR HOME:

Throw these items in a shaker with 5 ice cubes:

4 ounces tomato or vegetable juice

2 ounces vodka

1 big teaspoon of horseradish, with some juice from the jar (this lump of horseradish makes straining the drink a little more time consuming, but it’s well worth it)

1 quick splash of Worcestershire sauce (if you’ve ever read the ingredients in Worcestershire sauce, then you know you need the organic stuff — I recommend “Wizard’s” from Whole Foods)

12 good splashes of your favorite hot sauce (I recommend “Texas Champagne” from Whole Foods)

1 tablespoon of lemon juice (or just squeeze most of one half of a lemon into the shaker)

Grind some sea salt and black pepper into the shaker

Shake it up, strain into two glasses (with or without ice is fine) and garnish with whatever you like (I like a lime slice and a jalapeno olive)

Grind a little more pepper on top

Sip it smugly, and pour some on the ground for all those suckers at the brunch spot paying $12 for V8 and well vodka.